Ok I first started becoming concerned when I'd be all curled up being my usual adorable self, getting pets and purring irresitably when one or the other of my humans would say, "and this is the the kitty who was just up on the piano knocking over the picture frames like a crazy cat?" or "and this was the kitty who we had to chase off the kitchen table 3 times today?" and the other bean would say "No way, it must've been his "evil twin."
I would get a little worried and think, "I wasn't up on the piano, I wasn't up on the table, and I certainly don't smell another cat around here evil or otherwise. What on earth could be happening????" Then I figured it out.
Usually mommy leave the TV on the Family Channel for me to watch during the day. It is nice and quiet with lotsa dialog and it keeps me company, but sometimes she leaves it on channel 9 (from the news in the morning) and that is the channel One Life to Live is on. That is when I discovered "split pursonalities." That is when you have an "evil twin" side that is actually INSIDE your body!!! It has a name very similar to yours and everyone things the evil things it does is actually being done by you since it is your body. See, on One Life to Live, Jess's
evil alter is "Tess" 
and Viki's 
evil alter is "Niki." 
My alter ego is "Bendrix"
and HE is the one who gets up on the piano and knocks things over. HE is the one who scratches the carpet and gets up on the kitchen table and knocks the cruchies out of the bowl. HE is the one who steps on your tummy in the middle of the night making you have to get up and use the big people litterbox. I, sweet Hendrix, 
would never do those things. I, sweet Hendrix am the one who gives gentle headbutts to you to show you I love you. I'm the one who curls up under your arm in the night and purrs you to sleep. I'm the one who lays on your lap (not your belly) when you're sick and nurses you back to health and waits quietly and patiently for you to give me my plate of stinky goodness. Ok, that last part isn't true, but, come on, it is stinky goodness and I looooooooove it, but not as much as I love you. So, dear mommy and daddy, remember, it is Bendrix, not me, who needs to be chastised when there is wrongdoing afoot. I, sweet Hendrix
should be given extra treats and chin scritches for having my poor body misused in such a terrible way. sigh.
21 comments:
Awww. You're not evil, just energetic. It is your right as a kitty to be up on tall things and you wouldn't knock things off if they wouldn't put stuff in your way.
BTW-scary evil twin Nikki/Jessica on Heroes. Jessica is definitely not nice.
That's a totally cool idea you left on my blog about tuxedo kitties drinking from martini glasses so they can be like James Bond!
Oh no! That's horrible that you have a split personality and an evil twin living inside you. I hope that your humans feel sympathy for your affliction.
Oh my goodness!! That explains a lot of things!!! There are pet shrinks who can help with these things. And pet psychics, and drugs. Yup.
Luf, Us
That is a wonderful idea! Now I have to think of my alter identity name....
Chase
Hmmm, Bendrix you say...this explains everything! It must have been my evil twin Craisy who does all the bad things at my house. Not me at all.
Yup, yoo are correct! It's da evil twin inside of us. All da bad stuff dat happens iz done by Sippy, Zadie and Seedy not Zippy, Sadie and Speedy! We neffur do bad stuff, heer dat mommy, we'z not da bad one's it's our evil twins.
It all makes sense now! It was Bictor bein bad an Vonnie bein sweet :-) I wish Bonnie's nice twin would bisit more. Uh, don't tell her I sed that, ok?
hmmm and here i fought Miles was my evil twin. - Sammy
That was certainly a very interesting theory! I think that my evil twin's name is Sqwillow - that sounds more like an evil name instead of my nice name!
~ Willow
My evil twin name would be Dina Bat. But I don't get in trouble too often.
~ China Cat
Oh Mr hendrix it is such a relief to find that there is an actual diagnosis that will allow me to beat up my brother Mao without remorse! It wasn't me it was my evil alter ego mwa ha ha *rubs paws* mwa ha ha ha
xxxxx
Missy said...
that explains the visits by Hissie, I knew I wasn't too blame!
I think extra temptations would help, don't all of you?
Thank you, Mr. Hendrix!
We all knock stuff off of everything, the coffee tables, the table, you name it we do it. At least we have not broken anything as of yet...as Mommie says, knock on wood(whatever that means)
That Right that explans it an evail alult her call Her Mary Lou who been steal all that stuff and makeing nest not me. And it my eival alult tulip who been pounceing on Mu shue
Lilly Lu oops I ment Mary Lou And Iris ooops I ment tulup
Wow an alter ego....we wants one ~Merlin, Shadow, Ko KO
DKM calls me the Evil B*tch Goddess when my other side comes out.
Wow, that explains why I couldn't remember the Oscar party! It was my evil twin! I just need to figure out her name...thanks for the hint!
Tara
I think my People WISH I had a split personality. But really, all those things they complain about, it's really me ;)
Hendrix, I'm so glad you explained that. I'm going to make sure my mom reads it.
Hmmm...this explains some of our behaviors...
Your alter ego is terrorific! This is the face that needs the feline domination, muhahahahaha!!!
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